A Lovely Note from Beloved
Hubby - shortly after the birth:
I've only had a few hours of sleep for the past
few days, but the gush of love and adrenalin keep
coming for my beautiful daughter, Khadeeja. It
was an amazing few minutes, never seen anything
like that before.
It seemed like all heaven and earth shattered
and the sky parted, all angels chanted the name
of Allah and gathered to guard her way through
the world, and there she was my beautiful princess
appearing before my very eyes. It was truly a
miracle of life. By then I was gone, blown away
by such an awesome sight, a new life has just
begun!
I'm quite an emotional person, so as you can
imagine, I was carried away with all the tears
of joy, speechless until the she broke her first
cries. All I can whisper repeatedly was the name
of Allah, thanking Him for allowing me to witness
such surreal event... she looked so beautiful,
pure and soft. No words can describe her.
I always thought that I could never handle a
fragile newly-born, but there I was my fatherhood
instinct just kicked in, I had her in my arms
and whispered the name of Allah through adzan
and iqomah on her ears. She seemed to study it
very carefully and looked me sharply back in the
eyes in return as if she wanted to know who called
her to pray upon the God Almighty ...
My heart is all for Khadeeja from that moment
...
It's all clear to me now for all the courage
and pain that a mother must deal with to deliver
that special person. Astri was so much in pain,
it just broke my heart to see her like that, knowing
that she could never share it with me (apart from
her some bone-breaking squeezes on my arms!!).
But whoever invented the epidural, he must've
been a genius (or something), since she was all
smiles after the doctor administered the drug
!!
Astri, thank you for giving me such a beautiful
daughter. It was the greatest gift that anyone
could ever ask for. Love you both forever.
xxx Mas Hendra xxx
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20 September 2004:
 8.00
pm: Kita nyampe North Gosford Private Hospital, sesuai
perjanjian yang dibuat ama
Dr Catt siang harinya pas check-up terakhir.
8.15 pm: Dikasih kamar 251 ama pihak hospital.
(foto kiri diambil sebelon induksi)
10.15 pm: EFM dipasang buat ngecek kondisi baby.
10.30 pm: Internal exam dilakukan, ternyata aku udah
1 cm dilated (bukaan 1).
Trus induction gel dimasukin. Monitor tetep dipasang
buat ngeliat baby's heart rate setelah induction.
 11.00
pm: Monitor dilepas trus aku bobo. Alhamdulillah bisa
bobo pules, kontraksi belon berasa sama sekali.
Sesekali bangun buat pipis ama minum. Mas Hendra ama
Ibu ikut nemenin bobo di kamar.
21 September 2004:
06.00 am: Pas bangun mo Subuh, ternyata I had a 'show'.
Ini istilah dipake kalow kita lagi in labour (or before
labour) trus keluar darah dikit.
Akhirnya aku mandi aja biar berasa seger ngadepin labour.
07.00 am: Jalan-jalan di koridor hospital biar cepet
berasa kontraksi, masih sepi banget suasana.
08.00 am: Breakfast in bed. Abis itu aku jalan-jalan
lagi, ditemenin ama Mas Hendra.
Kali ini jalan-jalan keluar ke halaman ampe parkiran
karena udaranya udah angetan.
Sempet ketemu ama Dr Catt di carpark. (foto kanan lagi
jalan-jalan di halaman)
09.30 am: Internal exam lagi, masih 1 cm dilation.
Wuhuuuu, pantes belon berasa apa-apa sama sekali.
Trus ama midwive dikasih gel kedua dengan dosis lebih
tinggi dari semalem. Monitor dipasang lagi selama 15
menit.
Trus kita ditinggal lagi.
 10.00
am: Jalan-jalan dilanjutkan lagi, cuman banyakan di
dalem hospital ajah.
Kadang balik ke kamar, men gem di laptop ama Mas Hendra.
Kontraksi udah mulai berasa tuw, kaya mules pas lagi
mens.
Jadi ya masih bisa ketawa-ketawa deh.
11.30 am: Diminta ama midwive pindah ke birthing unit,
soalnya Dr Catt kasih komando aku dikasih induksi lagi,
cuman kali ini pake syntocinon drip (aka infus).
Selaen itu artificial membrane rupturing (aer ketuban
dipecahin) juga mo dilakukan.
Ya udah deh, pindahan... Beberapa barang buat labour
kita angkutin ke birthing unit.
(foto kiri tuw sebelon ketuban dipecahin).
12.00 pm: Internal exam lagi sebelon membrane rupture.
Udah 3 cm dilation.
Abis itu aku makan siang cuman gag boleh makan padet,
jadi makan jelly ama minum jus ajah.
Abis makan, drip dimasukin lewat pergelangan tangan
kiri karena aku right-handed.
Naaaaaah, mulai dari sini niiiiy rasa sakitnya bow,
langsung berasa banget.
gag sopan deh, kirain bakalan gradually, eeeeeeh, ini
mah kaga. Langsung aja slonong boy.
Aku udah gag bisa gerak-gerak lagi deh. Pantat berasa
nancep di sofa... kekeke...
Pokonya the only thing I could do was sitting-up right
biar labour gag melambat.
 Makin
berasa stress pas Annette bilang kalow dripnya saat
itu masih dosis rendah.
Perkiraan bisa ngebantu bukaan rata-rata 1 cm per hour.
Waks... artinya aku diharapkan melahirkan sekitar jam
7 malem...
Ya udah, apa boleh buat, kuat-kuatin aja diiringi istighfar
terus...
01.00 pm: Setelah 1 jam, aku gag tahan, minta gas ke
Annette, midwive yang emang ngebantuin labourku sejak
pagi.
Pas lagi gag kontraksi, aku pindah dari sofa ke birthing
bed yang udah disiapin dalam posisi duduk.
Yang lucu, sebelon kasih gasnya, Annette bilang, efek
samping gas tuw ntar aku bisa berasa mabok kek abis
minum wine...
Weks, as if... mas Hendra langsung bilang 'Well, she
doesnt' drink' maksudnya gimana ngebayanginnya gitu
looooo..
01.15 pm: Ternyata emang bener sodara-sodara... Walowpun
aku gag pernah minum wine, cuman bisa deh ngebayanginnya..
Wuiiiih, baru 3 kali breath-in breath-out, langsung
deh berasa terbaaaaang... kekeke.. :D
Ngantuuuuuk banget, mata gag bisa ngebuka deh. Kata
Mas Hendra tampangku saat itu emang konyol banget...
wekekeke.. :p
(foto kanan tuw aku lagi breathing-in the gas).
 01.30
pm: Setelah 6 kali niup gas, akunya gag kuat... Gasnya
udah gag mempan lagi, dan ujung-ujungnya aku muntah...
Belepotan dah pokonya yang namanya birthing gown itu.
Trus ama Annette ditawarin hot shower.
Karena efek samping gas, aku gag kuat berdiri, jadi
hot showernya sambil duduk di kursi, ngebelakangin shower
biar punggungku kena aer angetnya. Enak beneeeeeeeeerrrr..
Berasa dipijit-pijit... :D
Mas Hendra nemenin aku terus deh pokonya, ampe jeans
dia basah semua... hihihiiiy.. :D
01.45 pm: Hot shower udah mulai gag mempan juga. Sakit
makin melilit dan heboh. Akhirnya aku minta ke Mas Hendra
bilangin ke Annette buat epidural. Ama Annette langsung
arrange anaesthetist.
02.00 pm: Internal exam dilakuin lagi sebelon epidural.
Ternyata oh ternyataaaaa... Aku udah bukaan 8, jadi
5 cm dilation had been happening in the past 2 hours.
Pantes aja sakitnyaaaaaa... :D Sedikit lega juga soalnya
itu artinya gag lama lagi aku fully dilated... :)
02.15 pm: Dr Warman yang mo nyuntikin epidural dateng
juga.
02.30 pm: Epidural mulai disuntikin. (foto kiri atas).
Tadinya aku pikir efeknya mulei berasa 15 menit kemudian,
eh ternyata tidak looooh...
Dalam itungan 2 menit kali, langsung deh rasa sakit
itu Alhamdulillah lenyap nyap nyaaaap... :)
Aku yang tadinya merem mulu, saat itu akhirnya bisa
juga ngebuka mata dan senyum...
Bayangkan, I was smiling when I was 8 cm dilated.. hihihiiiy..
:D Satu-satunya efek samping epidural yang aku rasain
cuman kedinginan ajah. Ama Mas Hendra langsung diambilin
hot blanket dari linen cupboard. Sementara itu Dr Warman
dan Annette ngawasin baby heart ratenya.
Eeeeeh, ko aga-aga drop yaaaaah... Emang sih baby heart
ratenya ada di angka 145-155 bpm, tapi kadang-kadang
bisa merosot ampe 66 bpm (itu yang terendah yang sempet
kerekam).
Langsung Dr Catt ditelpon, diminta dateng segera.
Dari percakapan antara Dr Warman dan Annette abis ngobrol
ama Dr Catt, kalow emang heart ratenya drop terus, bisa-bisa
C-Section (Caesarean) harus dijalankeun. Dalem hati
berdoa, duuuh, mudah-mudahan gag papa deeeeh...
Sambil mataku melotot mulu ngawasin monitor. Tiap drop
rasanya gimanaaaa gituw.
 02.45
pm: Internal exam dilakukan lagi, Alhamdulillah... ternyata
aku udah 10 cm dilated aka udah siap untuk melahirkan...
:D Tinggal tunggu keputusan Dr Catt ajah.
02.55 pm: Dr Catt dateng juga. Dia bilang, kemungkinan
besar dropnya heart rate karena si bub kelilit umbilical
cord. Dia bilang gag perlu Caesarean. Cuman perlu dibantu
vacuum ajah supaya kepalanya cepet keluar.
03.00 pm: Finally, diiringi aba-aba dari Annette dan
Dr Catt, aku ambil nafas dalem-dalem..
Dan Alhamdulillah, dengan satu kali big push, tepat
pukul 03.02 pm waktu Sydney, putri kami, Khadeeja Nugraha
menyapa dunia... :)
Kita berdua bener-bener gag bisa nahan nangis.. Rasanya
terharu banget ama kebesaran Allah SWT... :)
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